People, situations, circumstances, experiences, pain, bullying, and several things have made you stronger! 

You are strong now, and it’s not your fault! And there is no going back! 

Women tolerate abuse because of emotional vulnerability. - Gul Panag 

Before moving ahead, I would like to tell you that it may contain some mature content. If you are uncomfortable or do not understand such things, kindly do not read further. 

Contents

1. Strong Woman 
2. Strong Woman, Strong Man 
3. Strong woman with an Average man 
4. Imbalance in Personality and Relationships 
5. Why strong girls fall for bad boys 
6. Why does a man go for a woman who does not use her brain much 
7. Myth of beauty 
8. How wicked women are good at tuning men on their fingers 

1. Strong Woman

Dear Strong Woman!

If you are strong, It’s not your fault!

But do not let others use you in the name of strength, tolerance, and patience.

Be it in common relation with friends, colleagues, romantic, or any other form.

You are strong, and you might find it normal or can tolerate the unnecessary ego and drama in your relations, but If you allow them to get away with it once, you are telling them they can get away with it every time.

It is a harsh experience for several strong girls, and more friction comes from their family members or guardians. Sometimes from parents too!

So, I hope you understand the importance of raising your voice!

2. Strong Woman, Strong Man

It might seem like they are made for each other initially, but it is not after some months.

A Strong woman, who is emotionally, & financially independent, will struggle to figure out a balance of power over her partner because he doesn’t want to feel weak. He wants her to be submissive because of his strength. So he continues his attempts to claim dominance in their relationship.

And girls are taught to be a caretaker, and compassionate women, who have to sacrifice their will & desire for their partner.

So, she ended up struggling more.

3. Strong woman with an Average man

No matter how successful or independent they are, women become victims of their idea of a perfect fairytale life, while men often become abusive to overcome their insecurities.

Such Men can repeatedly humiliate you in front of their friends, family members, relatives, or any 3rd person.

So, she ended up struggling more.

4. Imbalance in Personality and Relationships

When people have a good image in the outside society, their only space to let out imperfection is their own home.

So, If he is a nice guy to society, he’ll let out all his frustration at home. He can be violent beyond expectation.

He gets violent if women do not work according to his will, demand, habits, taste, and control.

So, she ended up struggling more.

5. Why strong girls fall for bad boys

Women feel that bad boys (not in the sense of character or criminal-minded person) will protect them from the outside world.

Why does it happen?

Even the most intelligent girl can lose her mind to her heart

Results

Such men take advantage of the vulnerability of women who crave a home, family, and other domestic bliss.

So, she ended up struggling more.

6. Why does a man goes for a woman who does not use her brain much

If a man is wise, the lady feels proud of his man.

But, if the lady is wise, a man does not always feel proud. She becomes a new competition for his mind. And he might get insecure, or he will start looking for other flaws in her. This will imbalance the relationship.

Since men are strong, intelligent, and imaginative, while women are physically weak and known for not-so-wise decisions or often emotional decisions.

All relationships go through cycles and phases. The honeymoon period doesn’t last forever. Work stress and family obligations can get in the way.

And in all this, he would not like an interruption from the woman, who would like to create mental pressure on him.

So, they go for women who do not use their brains much.

Women let men work for them, think for them, and take on their responsibilities. When a man feels like a king, at least in front of his woman, it boosts his ego.

So, a man goes for a woman who does not use her brain much.

If she is smart, she doesn’t use it much in front of her man intentionally. If she used it, she ended up struggling more.

7. Myth of beauty

People say that beauty will help you to keep your man in place. And they define beauty as a beautiful face and a perfect body figure.

Poets and sometimes Inspirational & motivational writers tell you that outer beauty doesn’t matter.

Which is nowhere the complete truth. 

The beauty of thought and inner beauty also matter, along with outer beauty.

Ignoring a significant factor is like missing an essential element in the Science lab, whose output will be unexpected.

The fact is:

Where the beauty of the face can help with short-term satisfaction.

It’s the beauty of thoughts (compatibility) and inner beauty (purity of heart) that helps keep the relationship in place for the long term.

And all three are essential in the necessary ratio!

8. How wicked women are good at tuning men on their fingers

Have you ever wondered why most men prefer the nastier girl to date?

She is clever and wicked. Who is innocent, beautiful, and glamorous by her face and looks for the outside world. Who can be dangerous & devil by heart?

According to psychologists and therapists, such women have had unfortunate learning experiences, especially about men. So, they developed a manipulative approach to dominate and control the man around them.

They understand how much a man will surrender to pursue sexual access.

They understand how to make him feel that there is no friction and that the man controls the relationship.

There are so many secrets only they can understand and know about men, along with the therapists and relationship counselors.

Ultimately, a man does not feel safe to show his vulnerability for one or more reasons to their partner, who deserves it. And wicked women ended up tuning them.

So, a strong woman ended up suffering.

Resources:

Good men project, Firstpost, observation, experiences of surrounding, books based on relationships written by counselors, and therapists, conversations with several other strong women who are either married or in Relationships.

❤️

I want to share because I’ve learned this from the behavior of people in my surrounding, going through the ups & downs of my life & the several other women I’ve interacted with in the Journey!

If you understand these, it can help you a lot. Go over it again, take your decisions with wisdom & overcome your weaknesses! All the best! 

Your Small Contribution can help lots of Strong Women to suffer less!

If you like it, kindly share your feedback, share it with your friends & follow me for more insightful content 

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Original Source: Why Strong Women suffer in relationships

Mani Shankar

Mani Shankar Soni is from Lucknow, Uttar Pradesh. He is a student of - Bachelor of pharmacy in the Professional Education field. His hobbies are: Reading books by foreign authors and listening to Classical music. 

INTERVIEW 

(Questions and Answers, in a conversation with Monika Singh and Mani Shankar)

If you could tell your younger self anything, what would it be?

Mani: I think: "Do not be sad if someone rejects you. Because people usually leave expensive things and go for the cheap ones".

What does literary success look like to you?

Mani: In my opinion, Literary success is the development of mostly pastime uses activities, creativity, and many other things related to the present.

Does a big ego help or hurt dreamers?

Mani: Mostly, big ego always hurts Dreamers.

What was an early experience where you learned that language (written words) had power?

Mani: In my experience, language always works as a medium to understand written or spoken communication.

What period of your life do you find most valuable, enjoyable & eye-opening too? (Child, teenager, young adult).

Mani: I found Teenager is part of my life and most enjoyable, & valuable

Do you Google yourself?

Mani: Yes! I do google myself.

What is the most significant judgmental point in society for boys?

Mani: The most significant critical point in society for boys is related to the job and marriage.

One rule you want to break in our society and family for boys/girls?

Mani: I want to break the rule regulations for the girls so that they can grow with boys.

What are your dreams and goals in your life?

Mani: The dream of my life is not big, but it is not small as well, so I want all those qualities that can give me an identity in society.

Who is your ideal in your life?

Mani: My mother is my ideal in my life. But the word cannot explain their feelings.

What do you think, people try to control boys' power in the name of responsibility?

Mani: People suppress boys' feelings in the name of responsibility. They do not have enough time for themselves too. So, I think no one can understand their feelings.

What is your favorite childhood book?

Mani: I have a favorite poetry book:The random house book of poetry.

One thing that always makes you happy, and you want to dance that time?

Mani: Only friends make me happy.

Which change needs our country for primary & real education?

Mani: New syllabus according to Hindu culture can change real education & primary education.

One thing you want to do for your parents?

Mani: I have many dreams for my parents. I can not explain it, and the future decides that.

Family or a friend, which one is more comfortable for you to share yourself?

Mani: Family and friends both help me in sadness.

Stay connected and follow for more terrific, honest Interview conversations with ordinary people who are doing extraordinary in their life. 

© Monika Singh and Mani Shankar

Original Source: Mani Shankar, dreamer - Interview Conversation with Monika Singh

Shashank Kumar is a student and author from Bihar. As a newcomer in the field of literature, he has published his debut novel “An Inspirational Vengeance” and worked in two anthologies as well.

From an early age, he has been fond of writing. Being from a state where the literacy rate is not so well, it’s his dream to uplift his state. Many famous personalities have represented Bihar in top-level competitions, so he, too, wants to be a part of it.

He is a teenager yet an undergraduate student at Delhi University. He has a keen interest in kho - kho and cricket. He is a rising YouTuber as well. He is working on his 3rd novel.

His goal is:- to work for laws and society. He wants to acquire all the qualities which a multi-talented guy should have.

Author Shashank

Questions and Answers!

A conversation between Monika Singh & Author Shashank Kumar

Monika: Mr. Shashank! Describe literary success!

Shashank: Literary success means a lot to me. It’s enthusiastic. When I stepped into the field of literature, I met many new faces who were somehow related to literature, and they helped me out. It is always a great treat to succeed in this golden field.

Monika: What was the best money you ever spent as a writer?

Shashank: The best money I have spent as a writer was when I was out of ideas and wanted to stay in peace for some time to think it over. But due to some “aatank baads” (cousins), It was tough. So what I did is that I gave them a party so that they would maintain peace.

Monika: Which one do you write about most often? (child, teenager, young adult). How do you select the names of your characters?

Shashank: Well, on that front, I would like to say that I always go for teenagers while writing. I always focus on the teens of this era. Sometimes selecting the 

The characters' names become hectic, so I put the words of my friends. 

Monika: Do you read your book reviews? How do you deal with bad or good ones?

Shashank: Yes, I do read reviews on my book title. See, your plot can be interesting for someone, but it also can be boring for someone. So it depends on which genre they like to read. Whether the review is good or bad. I always take it positively and try not to repeat those mistakes.

Monika: How did publishing your first book change your process of writing?

Shashank: Well, my first title made me feel the actual value of words and emotions. 

When readers go through your content and give feedback, it becomes the most important thing for a writer to earn good feedback because they work tough to complete a book. The same happened to me. My first title changed my writing skills, like where to put different emotions, where not to run by putting anything in the content, etc.

Monika: What is the best way to market your books?

Shashank: I think the best way to market books is- through reviews. The more positive response you will get, the more highlight your title will be. Moreover, the reviewers play a significant role in highlighting a book.

Monika: Do you think someone could be a writer if they don’t feel emotions strongly?

Shashank: Not at all. To be an author or a writer, the first thing is feeling. One should feel the atmosphere and those scenes. Then only they can pen that down so that readers can enjoy it.

Monika: What are common traps for aspiring writers?

Shashank: First, I would like to say that trap is everywhere in every field of life. Aspiring writers wish to showcase their talent but get stuck in the wrong hands. I won’t reveal names, but I will suggest to everyone that one should check and recheck, and then only they should make any agreement to publish or submit their content.

Monika: What is the greatest difference between book lovers and book reviewers, according to you? What is your opinion about those people who judge your book based on the cover?

Shashank: Interesting one! See, book lovers generally love to read books according to their fixed genre, which they adore. They are not there to help any author often, and yes, inevitable mistakes need to be edited. They go through your contents, and the worst thing is that they decide on a book by it is cover often. They prefer to read only those titles with awesome covers, irrespective of the viral content. But when it comes to reviewers plus book lovers, who love their work, they give their best. They check every line and let authors know if there is any edit needed or not. They do speak the truth and help authors to rise and shine. They love to go through every title to promote the authors. 

Monika: How many unpublished and half-finished books do you have?

Shashank: I’ve four unpublished contents and two finished books.

Here are links to finished books!

An Inspirational Vengeance

The Love You Feel

Love it?

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Simran Srivastava is the author of the novel ‘Marriage Without Love.’ She was born and brought up in Jhansi and currently lives there. She is Graduated in Commerce and pursuing Post Graduate Diploma in Banking and Finance from Symbiosis University. She also holds a Diploma in Financial Accounting and studied Egyptian Archeology.

She loves to sing, read books, and learn about Indian History. Last year in 2019, she wrote articles on Hollywood for Headlines of Today News Media Pvt. Ltd.

You can read her blogs on Books, Entertainment, Finance, Social Issues, Philosophy, and Quotes; On her Website 

INTERVIEW

( Questions and Answers, in a conversation with Monika Singh and Simran Srivastava )

What does literary success look like to you?

Simran: For me, literary success is not about getting famous. It is about someone reading and praising my work, which also honors me.

What is the first book that made you cry?

Simran: The first book which made me cry was ‘Until Love Sets Us Apart by Aditya Nighot. It contains a real story, and what happened to them made me cry. I can feel the pain that Rohit and Aisha went through, and in a blink of an eye, their happy life turns into their worst nightmare.

If you could tell your younger writing self anything, what would it be?

Simran: Examine what is wrong with you and think about the changes. Read more books as you can and learn. Participate in a competition from which you always run away. Try to talk without hesitation, be confident and face your fear.

What was the best money you ever spent as a writer?

Simran: The money which  I ever spent is on buying books and on traveling.

Which one do you write about most often? How do you select the names of your characters?

Simran: I wrote mainly on Young Adults. Characters are an essential part of any story. I select the names that tell the story of the emotional journey and show growth. They need to feel natural to the readers in terms of appearance, relationships, history, ambitions, speech, and personal flaws,  which to a certain extent, attract the readers' attention.

Do you read your book reviews? How do you deal with bad or good ones?

Simran: Yes, I do read Book reviews, and good ones always bring a smile to my face because it makes me feel proud that someone is reading my work and liking it. Bad ones hurt. But to succeed, you must face bad and good things together. Bad things always encourage me to work hard and move forward confidently, and no one ever gets success quickly; evil and good things always come along. Hence, accept the good ones and throw away the bad ones.

What was your hardest scene to write?

Simran: The hardest one for me was the ending because it is what all the readers look for. Some readers even read the Epilogue before they start reading the book, and if it is not good, they do not feel like reading it. Therefore, for me ending part is the hardest one to write.

Do you Google yourself?

Simran: Yes, I do Google myself, like every day.

What one thing would you give up to become a better writer?

Simran: Negativity, Laziness, and unnecessary distractions, too, create hindrances in my mind and stop me from writing.

What is your favorite childhood book?

Simran: During childhood, I only read comics like Twinkle, Chacha Chaudhary, Nagraj, and Champak. I like Fairy tales, but no one is my favorite.

Does your family support your career as a writer?

Simran: Yes, they do support me.

How long, on average, does it take to write a book? How many hours a day do you write?

Simran: Writing needs a lot of patience and diligence. I moderately write one Chapter a day, including 3 to 4 hours. If I write daily, the book will be finished in a month or two. Experts said that if we write 500 words per day, then we can publish 3-4 books in a year, but we need to be patient.

How did publishing your first book change your process of writing?

Simran: After publishing my first book, I learn how vital Proofreading is and creating a better design for your book cover. Editing your work is extremely important.

What’s the best way to market your books?

Simran: Nowadays, Bookstores are not the only platform to promote or market your book. Internet is best for selling anything, and you can do Giveaway alerts from Goodreads, Join the Readers group, Blog posts, Promote your book socially, and mail promotion. If you publish your book through Kindle, then Kindle provides us with Free Book Promotion, Kindle Countdown Deals, Amazon Advertising, and KDP select.

Do you think someone could be a writer if they don’t feel emotions strongly?

Simran: Well, I cannot answer this, but to write, you need to feel emotions. When I write anything, I connect myself with the characters and feel the feelings they are going through, and if I do not feel anything, then how readers will feel it and connect themselves with the characters. Whenever I am off, I cannot concentrate on writing because I cannot feel connected.

What is the most unethical practice in the publishing industry?

Simran: What is unethical for me in the publishing industry is self-publishing; we first need to pay a considerable amount to buy their packages. It is good that we can buy our ISBN and select a cover for our book, but it will be wrong if no unit is sold out. Even after all this, you do not find your book at bookstores. Besides, you need to do all the marketing, so it is unethical to me.

What is the common trap for aspiring writers?

Simran: After writing a book, every writer thinks they are best, and no one will reject their work, but it is not always true. Success comes with lots of hardship. Some writers, after receiving rejections and nasty comments, accept defeat and stop writing; but that is the time for them to prove to others is, how excellent they can do. 

What is the greatest difference between book lovers and book reviewers, according to you? What is your opinion about those people who judge your book based on the cover?

Simran: Book Lovers and Book reviewers are both different. Nowadays, I found that reviewers ask for money and DM us for Bulk Reviews with a huge amount. No one wants to read it like a lover but just to read and review it, but not every reviewer is the same. Book Lovers love the book, they accept any book, and they read it with a complete feel even if it contains flaws, but what matters to them is the story and feel that the writer tries to bring out. Well, for the book cover, I want to say, ‘Never judge a book by its cover.’ The Book Cover never explains to you what the book holds inside.

How many unpublished and half-finished books do you have?

Simran: One of my first writing, ‘Man of My Dream,’ is half published on Wattpad, and I am working on it. I am excited about this one because it is my first writing and contains many emotions.  

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